The Family Code mentions the word “love” only twice and the first mention of the word is found in Title III which covers Articles 68 up to 73 on the rights and obligations of spouses . The second mention of the word “love” is in Article 220 which states the rights and duties of parents towards their unemancipated children. Paragraph (2) of the said article states that among the duties of parents towards their children is “to give them love and affection, advice and counsel, companionship and understanding.”
Article 68 states, "The husband and wife are obliged to live together, observe mutual love, respect and fidelity, and render mutual help and support." Since living together and observing mutual love, respect and fidelity are obligations under the law, the question is, can a wife or husband legally compel his or her spouse to come home and comply with such obligations?
The Supreme Court in the case of Ilusorio vs. Ilusorio-Bildner (G.R. No. 139789 July 19, 2001 and G.R. No. 139808 July 19, 2001) stated among other things that “consortium” or “coverture” (the obligation to, live together, observe mutual, respect and fidelity) is prompted by the spontaneous, mutual love and affection between husband and wife and cannot be enforced by any legal mandate or court order.
The Ilusorio decision written by Justice Pardo revolved around this issue: “May a wife secure a writ of habeas corpus to compel her husband to live with her in conjugal bliss? The answer is no. Marital rights including coverture and living in conjugal dwelling may not be enforced by the extra-ordinary writ of habeas corpus.”
The Supreme Court as a final note in the Ilusorio decision stated, “No court is empowered as a judicial authority to compel a husband to live with his wife. Coverture cannot be enforced by compulsion of a writ of habeas corpus carried out by sheriffs or by any other mesne process. That is a matter beyond judicial authority and is best left to the man and woman’s free choice.”
Saturday, June 16, 2007
Can you legally force your spouse to live with and to love you?
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my husband and i have been married for 7 years and we have 2 kids, eldest is 6 turning 7 this year and the youngest is 3. i have worked before but presently i am unemployed. 2 years ago, me and my husband had a a big fight that caused our separation. he lived in his parent's house and i stayed with our kids in his house which he acquired when he was still single. but just last year her mother asked me to move in to their house since nobody will be staying and for me to save. so, me and my husband lived together but not as husband-wife but more of the so-called "civil" status. we had no sexual activity since the separation (more than a year now). he left last year to work abroad. since i am unemployed, his parents were the one supporting me with the kids' expenses, plus the monthly rental i get from our previous house. only late last year my husband supports me but i still need to ask for it every month.
i have plans of moving back to manila where my family and relatives live. and i am also planning to build a house on the lot my father gave me when i was still single.
my questions are:
1. Is the lot and the house to be build conjugal even if i acquire the lot before the marriage? what rights does my husband have? would you advice to go on with the building of the house of just have it sold?
2. about the custody of our children,will i have it even if i am unemployed? but i am actively looking for a job now.
3. If i decide to leave the house of my inlaws and get an apartment, will i still have the right to ask for the financial support of my husband?
4. If i decided to file for annulment of our marriage, will physical violence be enough grounds? i have a police blotter and medical certificate as proof but that was a year ago. does it have any lapse period?
kindly advice. thanks.
from: anonymous
1. If you got married AFTER August 1988 (the date when the Family Code became effective) and in your marriage contract you did not indicate what regime of property relations you want, then AUTOMATICALLY, absolute community of property became the rule for you and your husband. This means that ALL properties you and your husband brought into the marriage are part of your conjugal property.
Since your marriage has not been declared null and void, the house to be built will be deemed as part of the conjugal property. The presumption is that everything acquired during the marriage is conjugal.
2. Under Article 213 of the Family Code, children below the age of seven cannot be separated from the mother (except for compelling reasons). The fact that you are presently unemployed is not a compelling reason SINCE you can avail of the Solo Parents Welfare Act of 2000 and you can ask financial support from your husband under Republic Act 9262. Please read my article Support for abandoned woman and family.
You can copy and paste this link http://famli.blogspot.com/2006/10/support-for-abandoned-woman-and-family.html
3. Please read the Frequently Asked Questions section of my Family Matters website. It has discussions there on what grounds can be used for declaring a marriage null and void. The psychologist will conduct an interview with you and from your testimony, he or she will state what the root cause of your spouse’s psychological incapacity is. The fact that he hurts you can be part of the evidence that he is psychologically incapacitated.
4. You can try to get free legal help from the OLA (Office of Legal Aid) of the UP College of Law in Diliman, Quezon City, OR from the IBP (Integrated Bar of the Philippines). The IBP chapter offices are usually located in the Hall of Justice of cities.
I am separately living from my wife for about 6 years now. I want to file an anulment but I don't know her whereabouts and i haven't heard from her since we last met plus I am currently working aboard a cruise ship reason why I only have 2-3months vacation every year. Also if ever I purchase a lot and put it under my name,will she still have a conjugal claim even if i got it whilst we are separated? Can you please tell me how I can get started and would it be possible to file a case even if i can't personally attend? Thank you so very much.
1. Please read my article “If husband and wife have not seen each other for more than seven years, does it mean that their marriage is already void?” located at http://famli.blogspot.com/2008/02/if-husband-and-wife-have-not-seen-each.html.
2. Since your marriage is still valid (despite not having seen your wife for more than six years), any property you acquire will be presumed conjugal and thus your wife if she ever appears, can possibly claim her share of it. But if you can prove with the proper evidence (documents, receipts, testimonies of witnesses, etc), that the property was acquired with your personal money, this property can be deemed as not being part of the conjugal property.
3. You have options of filing for petition for declaration of presumptive death for purposes of remarriage OR a petition for declaration of nullity based on Article 36 of the Family Code (psychological incapacity). At the very least, so that you will not worry about your wife claiming a share in the property you want to buy, you should file for judicial separation of property.
You have to attend the hearings of whatever petition you file. You can ask the court through your lawyer to schedule the hearings during the times you are here in the Philippines. OR through your lawyer, you can avail of what are called modes of discovery like DEPOSITION before action or petition. This will give you some breathing space so that certain portions of the petition can be held by the court even if you are not in the country. Please e-mail me so I can give you the names of lawyers who might be able to handle your case.
my husband and i have been separated for almost 7 years now and we have a daughter. only last year, i have secured pertinent documents from the POEA after i have presented our marriage certificate and have found out that he has declared his live-in partner as his legal beneficiary in OWWA and legal dependent in Philhealth, totally disregarding our daughter. my questions are:
1. what can i do about it? can i file a legal action regarding that?
2. what about my daughter? can i compel my husband to declare our daughter as his beneficiary?
3. do i still have a right over my husband even if we are already separated?
4. can i compel him to give his monthly support for our daughter even if he is on vacation?
by the way, my husband is working abroad as a seafarer and he has been supporting our daughter since February last year after i wrote to his agency asking for support.
Please read my article Support for abandoned woman and family in this blog. Look for the link in the Previous Posts section on the sidebar.
Through a Protection Order under RA 9262, you can compel your husband to support your child.
You can ask for FREE legal help in getting a Protection Order from the IBP (Integrated Bar of the Philippines) chapter in your town or city. The IBP chapter offices are usually located in the Hall of Justice; you can also check the Internet for the IBP offices. You can also ask for help from the PAO (Public Attorneys Office) in your place. If you are from Metro Manila, you can also ask for free legal help from the OLA (Office for Legal Aid) of the UP College of Law, Diliman, Quezon City.
hank you very much aty. more power and god bless.
I'll be honest with you attorney, i'a m a lesbian who has a girlfriend who just gave birth last july 4,2008..he got pregnant with his co-worker,when we broke up just last year of august this guy already have two kids from two different woman..the pregnancy was never one of her plans,anyway they were just together for 2months when the guy intentionally got her pregnant because he knew that we had a relationship before they were together,this was probably because of the ego of the guy or insecurity with me because all the time that they were together,she was never happy with him..so after the first trimester of her pregnancy she ended their relationship,and we got back together..the guy disappeared
for a few months and he just suddenly appeared when my girlfriend is about to give birth, he signed the birth certificate of the child under his last name w/o the consent of my girlfriend, she originally planned to carry her last name for her child.. after being discharged from the hospital after she gave birth last july 4, she was confined again due to heart failure just this july 11,we're thinking that this was probably caused by the pressure and depression that this guy came interfering again after they broke up and most importantly in supposedly carrying her last name..
now she is getting frustrated that her child will unfortunately carry this guy's last name instead of hers..
will she still be able to change it to her last name even if the guy was the one who signed the birth certificate, since she did not know that the guy already signed the birth certificate cause she just gave birth, of course she was still weak at that time so she did not have the opportunity to sign the birth certificate herself, anyway they are not married and not even in good terms..
we really need help because we dont know what to do we're planning to take the baby away from the guy for what he did but he's threatening my girlfriend that since he signed the
birth certificate he can claim for custody or rights for the child,and according to him that he will do anything just so we may not take the baby away from him even if it gets to court..
attorney does he have this right to do so?
please we really need advise immediately before it's too late to
change the last name of the child to my girlfriend's, the mother..
thank you..
GODSPEED!
1. For the answers to your questions on RA 9255, please read my article entitled “What’s in a name? Problems with RA 9255 and its IRR” dated July 14, 2008.
2. Please read my article ”Can a mother be deprived of custody of her child?” The man can petition the court to terminate the woman’s parental authority and for custody to be given to him on the ground of immorality, specifically, being involved in a lesbian relationship.
attorney,,with regarding your response to my letter ;
1. For the answers to your questions on RA 9255, please read my article entitled “What’s in a name? Problems with RA 9255 and its IRR” dated July 14, 2008.
2. Please read my article ”Can a mother be deprived of custody of her child?” The man can petition the court to terminate the woman’s parental authority and for custody to be given to him on the ground of immorality, specifically, being involved in a lesbian relationship
what if the guy is already married?
and is there actually a way to prove that the girl really is having a relationship with a lesbian? i mean there can never be any documentation to prove this right?
unlike if the guy was already married will it take away his right for the child?
and isn't it that the mother should have full parental authority over the child?
and what if the guy had police records of different cases?
can his right be taken away from the child?
thank you
1. Please read my article “Custody battles over children: What determines fitness of one parent over another?” also in this blog. The judge will weigh the evidences presented by the parties involved. In the extreme case, the judge can, if it established that neither parent is fit, ask the DSWD or any child-rearing agency to take custody of the child.
In custody battles, the court's foremost consideration is the paramount interest of the child.
It is true that under Art. 176 of the FC, illegitimate children are under the parental authority of the mother. But the biological father can file the proper petition asking the court to terminate the parental authority of the mother and for such to be transferred to him.
2. In law, evidence can take the form of physical evidence, documentary evidence or testimonial evidence. In this situation, of course, there may not be documentation as you said, but the guy can present testimonial evidence (from family, relatives, neighbors, office mates, etc).
i am currently pregnant with my boyfriend (not exactly my boyfriend but something happened to us) but before him i have two children(my uncle is the father of the two). When i told my boyfriend about it he didn't give a comment but his mother don't accept me because of my pass (having two kid with my uncle). They don't believe that the father of my soon to be born baby is their son. What can i do for my boyfriend to support us? Please reply...
Thank you....
You can file civil and/or criminal cases against the man under RA 9262 Anti-Violence Against Women and their Children Act of 2004. Please read the following articles:
Hope and help for the battered woman (2): RA 9262 essential provisions
Hope and help for the battered woman (3): RA 9262 Protection Orders
Hope and help for the battered woman (4): Emotional abuse / psychological violence
Please also read Support for abandoned woman and family also found in this blog. This applies to you even though you are not married to the man.
Essentially, you need to get a Protection Order from the court to obligate the ma to support you. Part of the Protection Order, you can ask the court to issue a Hold Departure Order.
You can try to get free legal help from the IBP (Integrated Bar of the Philippines) chapter in your town or city. You can also ask the DSWD in your area for help in filing a petition for Protection Order.
Hi Atty:
I hope you can give me an advice regarding my current situation. My husband and I got married early this year. After we got married, I went back to the US. We got married by a lady reverend, and in good faith thought that every thing is being handled properly. However, when my husband got a copy of our marriage contract, the person who signed our marriage contract is different from the person who married us. Also, they put that we didn't need a marriage license because we were living together. We couldn't possibly live together because I am living in the US. The US Embassy saw all these errors during my husband's interview and was denied. We are planning to appeal his case at the US Embassy because we have all the proof of our 6 years long distance relationship. However, our marriage contract will play a big part on the appeal. Here are my questions: 1. Is our marriage voidable since we got married without a marriage license, and the person who married us turned out to have an expired license?
2. Is our marriage still valid if my husband and I dont contest it?
3. Who can appeal for our marriage be voided? My husband and I dont want to contest our marriage.
4. How can we make our situation right without having to go through an annulment and remarrying?
I am in great need of your advice. Please help. Thank you very much.
Dear Atty.,
May I ask some advice? I am married with 4 children(2 are above 21 yrs old and 2 are below 12 yrs old). I am no longer living under the same roof with my wife for 6 years now.She lives in the house which we loaned as husband and wife. And I live and supporting my 2 younger children.
I already told her over and over again that our marriage is over and I don't want to live with her anymore. I want to sell the house so we could pay the loan.I told her I will give her her rightful share of the proceedsbut she doesn't want to sell it.
I have 2 questions:
1. can i force her to move out of the house so it can be sold?it would be a waste if she lives there and yet we won't be able to pay for the housing loan. by the way, the lot is an inheritance frommy parents.
2. since a legal separation and annulment can take so long, can i get a document saying that although i am still legally married to her, i am no longer in love with her,not living with her and that i have no care on what she does with her life and that she should no longer interfere with mine?
hope you can help me. thanks and Godspeed.
Under the circumstances you should file a petition for judicial separation of property. This is governed by Articles 134 to 142 of the Family Code.
Please take note of Article 100, paragraph (2) as to your remedy for selling the house:
Art. 100. The separation in fact between husband and wife shall not affect the regime of absolute community except that:
(1) The spouse who leaves the conjugal home or refuses to live therein, without just cause, shall not have the right to be supported;
(2) When the consent of one spouse to any transaction of the other is required by law, judicial authorization shall be obtained in a summary proceeding;
(3) In the absence of sufficient community property, the separate property of both spouses shall be solidarily liable for the support of the family. The spouse present shall, upon proper petition in a summary proceeding, be given judicial authority to administer or encumber any specific separate property of the other spouse and use the fruits or proceeds thereof to satisfy the latter's share.
3. As to that document you are contemplating, such is illegal and immoral. The Supreme Court as early as the 1930s has already ruled that any lawyer or notary public drafting or signing such a document will be disbarred. Please read my post titled “Can a husband and wife in a notarized document declare that they are free to marry other persons and they will not file charges against each other?”
my female friend has been married via a shot gun marriage, and from the start she doesn't love her husband, they been married because of the influenced of parents of the guy who happen the boss of my friend's dad. is a marriage under this case can be declared as null and void from the start?
Article 45 of the Family Code states that a marriage may be annulled if the consent of either party was obtained by force, intimidation or undue influence, unless the same having disappeared or ceased, such party thereafter freely cohabited with the other as husband and wife.
Please take note of the last clause “unless the same having disappeared or ceased, such party thereafter freely cohabited with the other as husband and wife”.
Article 47 also states that the petition to declare the marriage void must be filed by the injured party, within five years from the time the force, intimidation or undue influence disappeared or ceased.
This means that if your friend continued to live in with the husband after the force or intimidation has ceased, then the marriage can no longer be declared null and void. Your friend only had five years from the time the force or intimidation stopped to file the petition. Beyond the five year period, the petition can no longer be filed.
I am 47 yrs old and have been married for 27 years. When I got married, I was only 20 yrs of age and at that time my parents were in the USA. My brother was the one who signed the marriage license. My life as married has never been smooth ever since it started. I really do not love my wife and have stated because of the kids. Now I 3 children are over 20 yrs of age and the youngest is 13. I think its about time that I should file annulment. Can it be a ground for annulment the misrepresentation or forged signature of father as the consenting parents in the marriage license valid for annulment? 1982 was the year the marriage occured. I would like to know before I go through the process.
When you got married in 1982, the prevailing law was not the Family Code but the New Civil Code of the Philippines. The FC’s minimum age for marriage is 18, while under the NCC, minimum marrying age was 14 for women and 16 for men.
Even without the parental consent, the NCC (and even the FC) provides that if the party whose parent did not give consent continued to live with the other party after reaching 21, then the marriage has been ratified. Since you continued to live with your wife and had several children with her, the lack of parental consent cannot be used as a ground for declaring a marriage null and void.
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